What would Jesus not do?
Things Jesus would do:
- Flip tables
- Turn water into fine wine to save your wedding party
- Tell the weather outside to STOP
- Curse trees for producing shitty fruit
- Bring people back from the dead
- Go fishing
- Give you food
- Whatever the hell he wants to on the Sabbath
- Make furniture
- Walk across the ocean because you need to stop
This…is the best
As Stalkingstalkerthatstalks said: Canon Jesus is better than fanon Jesus.
Canon Jesus is better than fanon Jesus.
CAN I GET THAT ON A TSHIRT
Fanon Jesus is a white guy who hugs lambs
Canon Jesus is a sassy middle eastern guy who hung out with prostitudes and spread peace and acceptance of everyone
who also hugged lambs
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oh god oh god I clicked the first one and now I’m having a breakdown
24 hours and 25 minutes until I turn 18
I like Legos, you like Legos, why don’t we build a relationship?
This cheesy pick up line is my legacy
you go ambahh
STOP THIS IS THE MOST BRILLIANT AND SUBTLE FORESHADOWING
LIKE THAT LINE SLIPS PAST US BECAUSE WE THINK HE’S KIDDING AROUND BUT IN ACTUALITY
HE WAS USING HER THE ENTIRE TIME AND HE KNEW IT
like is no one gonna pick up that HE IS THE ONE WHO STOPS HER SONG ABOUT FREEDOM? HE CUTS HER DOWN WITH HIS HORSE.
"I know it all ends tomorrow,
So it has to be today
‘Cuz for the first time in forever
For the first time in forever
Nothing’s in my way!”
AND SLAM. HANS IS IN HER WAY. NO ONE IS GONNA TALK ABOUT THIS FORESHADOWING
If I follow you, yes, I care about your garden, what your cat did today, the jewelry you made, that one friend who said the thing, i like your sense of humor, and also your selfies.
please do not let ferguson die out like everything else big does. do not let this die out. do not let this continue on for three days and then everyone forget about it. do not let this happen.
queue this post up 3 days from now, a week from now, a month from now, a month from then. make sure even if you forget your blog will remember.